From where I actually am
On AI, pace, and being a designer and dad in the middle of all this.
It’s been sixteen years since I entered the design industry, and the frame I trained in (define the state, design the state, ship the state) no longer fits the systems I’m building.
Lately the anxiety hits hardest at 3 am, on a feeding shift with my newborn, scrolling through what my design friends are shipping with AI. New tools weekly. New “you’re falling behind if you haven’t tried this” posts daily. The pace assumes a version of me that doesn’t exist right now.
Between a full-time design role, Senate work at my old school, and two kids, I’m not keeping up. And I’m starting to wonder how many of us actually are. Or whether we’ve just gotten better at looking like we are.
I don’t have a thesis yet. Just a hunch that the answer isn’t “try harder” and isn’t “opt out.” It’s something else, and I want to figure out what.
I want to write more here. From where I actually am. With a baby on my chest, trying to figure out what any of this means for the craft I’ve spent half my life on.
If you’re somewhere in the middle too, pull up a chair. I’ll put the kettle on.